Do you hear everyone talking about enjoying these flaky crustaceans, but are too embarrassed to try one because you don't know how to eat them? Don't worry, it's simple. Use this simple guide and you can walk with confidence into the nearest café.
Start by removing and carefully eating the claws. While your croissant certainly should be dead by the time it is served to you, the claws are still a hazard while they remain attached, as they still have sharp edges.
The claws are considered a delicacy for their crunchy exoskeleton, but are not to everyone's tastes. You may wish to offer the claws to a tablemate if it's more to their tastes.
Next, remove the dorsal ridge, or "spine". (This is not a true spine, as crustaceans instead have an exoskeleton.) It holds together the rest of the shell, and removing this thin piece will make the rest of the meal go more smoothly. Peel it back starting from the front, again being careful around the sharp tip.
As with the claws, this part may be crunchier than you prefer.
Now you can start peeling off the shell, exposing the tender, moist flesh underneath. Start at the back, where the dorsal ridge ended, and peel underneath and around. Don't be concerned about getting your hands messy! Croissant is just a very hands-on and messy food, like tacos or corn-on-the-cob. If you try eating it with utensils, you'll just make a bigger mess.
Now you can unroll the unusual spiral flesh of the croissant. Take a moment to appreciate the convergent evolution here, as such spiral body forms are most often seen in mollusks, not crustaceans.
And most importantly, enjoy!